The rowdy spectacle of 100 villagers in China blocking a groom’s car on the way to pick up his bride – and demanding money and cigarettes from him– has reignited the debate about controversial mainland wedding customs.
The raucous events unfolded en route to a wedding in a village in Taizhou in eastern China’s Jiangsu province on October 20, when the motorcade of the groom was intercepted by a large crowd of mainly elderly residents, Fengqi Video reported.
Based on tradition, relatives of the groom are required to give old villagers what they ask for, which can be anything from sugar or cigarettes to red packets containing money.
If they are not satisfied with the offerings, theoretically, the groom might not get to see his bride or his arrival could be seriously delayed.
The ritual of blocking the groom’s path is called lan men, which means “blocking the door”.
The intention is to test how determined the husband-to-be is to wed his sweetheart, and for the couple to share their happiness by giving gifts.
Some relatives and friends of the bride even pose challenges such as making the groom guess riddles, recite poems or display his singing and dancing skills.
According to a wedding planner in Taizhou, the family of the groom usually prepares a range of gifts and money to distribute to the crowd blocking the groom’s car.
“If there are many people there, the groom’s family just put one yuan (14 US cents) into each red packet. If there are not so many people, they will put 10 yuan in the red packet,” the wedding planner said.
“It is old people who had lan men on their wedding day when they were young who are trying to keep the custom going,” she added.
The Taizhou wedding created a buzz among online observers on mainland social media, with 6,000 comments left on Douyin, most of which condemned the tradition.
“What a vicious custom. It’s obviously robbery,” said one person.
“This custom will deter young people from getting married,” wrote another.
Some took the opposite view: “It won’t cost much. A red packet with one yuan is fine. The point is to have a big crowd to create a lively atmosphere. If few people come to join the lan men event, it implies that the groom’s family don’t get along well with others in the community.”
Other controversial wedding rituals include the notorious hun nao, or “wedding hazing”.
This custom allows wedding participants to make fun of the groom, the bride and even the bridesmaids. It has led to violence and sexual harassment in some cases.
Another unusual custom, observed by some families in southeastern Jiangxi province, requires that the bride, dressed in traditional wedding attire, sits barefoot for several hours before meeting the groom to take their vows.
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